Wednesday. Took mum to church and came home. Poor Buster had been sick.

Good day to you my brothers and sisters.


The fullness of joy is to behold God in everything.  Julian of Norwich.

This reminds me of when I lived in London with my late wife, who happened to be a londoner from East Acton. Going to work on the underground, there was a station where the loudspeaker would repeat, `Mind the gap`.
A little while ago I bought a book entitled `God of the gaps.`
I dont now remember at a conscious level all it said. The thing is though, I do wonder now that I have time to be still, and also time to ponder, isnt it the silence and stillness that many people avoid just because deep down we are frightened of what we will be confronted with!
We are all created as distinct individuals, even albeit on a usual pattern. One head and four limbs. Two eyes, two ears, one nose and one mouth. Etc etc. We also have the family and clan instinct. For much of the time this works well. It doesnt work well when the society is so rigid that anyone who doesnt conform to strict rules is thrown out, imprisoned or tortured. When in the past a great thinker said that the world wasnt the centre of the universe, he was shut up until he recanted. The church had it wrong.
Actually, when I say the church had it wrong, I ought to say it was a false church that had it wrong.
We must not throw the baby out with the bathwater. Following good guidelines is essential for an ordered universe. The sun will shine on half the world and then as the earth goes around it will shine on the other half. This gives all a time to rest. Imagine if our brains we full of information and also we were going over it to work out what was the best thing to decide, soon we would be in overload. Letting go of control of what is both inside of us and outside is essential most of the time. The universe wont grind to a halt.
If we are made in the image of God then yes, we too are creative. We have a built in need to love and receive love. To organise and shape our lives and the environment. To learn lessons and in doing so sometimes make mistakes. This way we find out what real love is. As it says in the Good Book, it is in giving that we receive. We have to give space and be open to filled with newness of life. If a cup is full with mud, it will take the pouring of much spring water into it before you get a cup of crystal clear water. Yet if you take a little time first, to empty the mud and wipe it clean, then you will not waste any of the pure water with which you pour in. If we have got to a point in our lives where we are wanting to be true to ourselves and to everything outside ourselves ( in realisation that there is no real distinction and we are all one.) that which is false will be coming less and less into our orbit. Like attracts like.
I have to head off now as its approaching seven pm and Im going to find the house where my potential sponser in AA lives.
So peace and soham to you all. Your brother Peter.            

Tuesday. I do like the Rolling Stones song `Ruby Tuesday` but...........

Good day my brothers and sisters. How often do we get stumped by that `but`! EXCLAMATION MARKS RHETORICAL QUESTION. On this occasion. Apparently, I am informed that using capital letters when txtng is rude as it is regarded as shouting. Well okay, I was going to ramble on a bit here, but will stop before I forget what the blog title refers to.
Ruby Tuesday, is a track Id listen to a lot in the eighties whilst incarcerated in Broadmoor Special Hospital. Love the tune - can see hear it in my imagination - but cant remember the words, or what they are about.
This got me to thinking about how people in general don't want to be thought of as at all like sheep; yet just as one sheep jumps over an imaginary obstacle, so others follow. Want to see this in action on a mass scale then look at footage of the Nurenberg rally. People may tell you that they are not influenced by advertising, or peer group pressure. I am not a cynic, but a realist. Big companies would not spent millions of  Dollars on it if it had no effect.

REALITY CHECK
Coca Cola is not the real thing. Nope, indeedy not. No way. Its just a flavoured sugary drink. OH, but its better than Pepsi cola. If I hear that sort of talk, then I hit the ground praying for the salvation of this human race. Race. Gotta win the race . Race war. War against the machine.
Silver machine. Hawkwind.
Hawkwind.
Rock band.
Rock.

My name is Peter and yep I am the rock. Move over Dywane and make way for the real thing. Cos man, I no longer live, yet Christ lives in me. Say whatever negative things you want do to us, we will keep coming back. You can throw us to the lions in Rome. Or behead us like you did to John the Baptist. We are just gonna keep on coming back loving you. Remember the song, "All you need is Love". What happened to John Lennon! Where did he go? America. No we love ya really. Not sure about Bill Rielly or the space race. Is that over. When I lived in the Philippines I had a very good american friend from Texas, called Micheal Morgan. He was a Vietnam vets, yet in his sixties and was a bit dissillusioned with the whole materialistic America is the greatist country in the world  thing. When he died I believe I was the only white man at his funeral.
My Master Jesus gave me a great example to follow, when He washed His disciples feet. This is God incarnate, who came to earth to be born in an outhouse. A stable! Yep, thats right, a place to house animals. I got respect for the Buddha who was born a wealthy prince and renounced his privaleged life to seek enlightenment. Christ though. Jesus came down, descended from Heaven, to be sought after when a babe to be killed by Herod. That was not His time to die. Nor later in the market place, when people mobbed together to get Him, but He slipped away. At the end, the human in him didnt want to die, but He submitted to His/our Father in Heaven and said, "Not Mine, but Your will be done." Amen.
You can call me an idiot. You can call me braindamaged. You can call me late for lunch. But never call me an unbeliever, or I will hit, yes I will hit the ground praying for you. Peace and love to all beings. TTFN Your brother Peter. (Maybe not yet quite the rock, but a pebble. But not, I repeat NOT stoned!)  Sober , but not complacent!    
       

The art of getting better. Letting go of past and being present.

  There was a man who ate a lot and was still hungry, and another who ate a little and was satisfied. The one who ate a lot and was still hungry received a greater reward than he who ate little and was satisfied.
Apohthegmata Patrum

Good day my brothers and sisters. What was your initial thought on reading that? Mine was on the purely literal, surely the man who ate little was better of than the man who was hungry. Then I looked at it from the spiritual viewpoint. I saw myself, as one who has never been contented with this physical plane and is always searching and taking in spiritual sustenance. It is not for the purpose that one is still hungry, it is because one cannot be satisfied with worldly things alone. The world will at a point in time pass, yet Gods love is eternal.

`The enemy of our Salvation especially strives to draw our heart and mind away from God when we are about to serve Him, and endeavours to adulterously attach our heart to something irrelevant. Be always, every moment, with God, especially when you pray to Him. If you are inconsistant, you will fall away from life, and will cast youself into sorrow and straitness.`
                                        St John of Konstadt

Becoming centred for me is to let go of thoughts of self. God alone is enough. This thought brings me to God as my centre and my centre as connected to all in the universe. In church millions of people at one point in the service will say, "We are all part of the one body." Do we realize it! I do and then I lose the connection, with the intrusion on worldly thoughts. I get it again and keep in it by not trying to hold on to it!

  The knowledge of the Cross is concealed in the Sufferings of the Cross.
                                       St Isaac the Syrian

The work of prayer belongs to the angels, and is, therfore, the special concern of the church. Every othe work, ie, charity, nursing the brethren; visiting the sick, caring for prisoners, releasing captives, and other similar things, is done by the brethren in love and offered by them to God. Similarly, poverty, fasting, sleeping on the ground, prostrations, vigils, etc, are good and like a sacrifice to God, because they aim to subdue and humble the body so that we may be purified and approach God and become friends of God-- yet these things do not present us directly to God, whereas prayer does so and unites us with him. A person praying acts towards God like a friend -- conversing, confiding, requesting --- and through this become s one with our maker himself.
                                           St. Symeon of Thessolonica.

I really get a lot from the one above. It makes me think of when we can think of ourselves as Godly people and yet spend more time watching mindless television than in the company of God. Perhaps thats the main reason I chose to have this computer and no actual hooked up television!
Its coming up to 10am and Buster has already been over the meadow once, but that was just a short jaunt as there was a fullsize poodle out for exercise which they have been confrontational with each other and the owner loses her head a bit.  Descretion is the better part of valour, thought I whilst beating a hastey retreat!
Me and the Buster are going to go out again shortly and I thought I would do as I have some times done recently. Every time I pick up a bit of litter - which by the way is helping to tidy His kingdom - I shall say `Thank you Jesus` whist thinking of all the things I am thankful for. Like being able to walk free and not be locked up in a prison, either justly or unjustly. Being able to walk or run and not be in a wheelchair or bedbound. Having another day to repent and say sorry for all past wicked actions, words and thoughts. Being gratefull for all I have especially forgiveness for others and myself. If we cant love ourselves, we are belittling Jesus, for dying on the cross to pay for all our transgressions. So as I have said, I am off now with the thought, `Thank You Jesus` in my head.

Blessings and peace to you, my brothers and sisters. Peter      
 

Sunday. Buster and & me with the sun behind us. Latest artwork & Buster walk by with stick.

Good day my brothers and sisters. Its sunny here in Luton.  I have had my sons overnight and also got only about three hours sleep due to terrible cough. Or perhaps a better desription would be a persistant cough. This means I am unable to attend church this morning as I cant be coughing all the way through the service.  



Although I wont be taking the boys to All Saints church, it does say in the bible that when two or more are gathered together in the name of God then he is with us. Joshua my eldest has gone to the shop for a second time to buy baked beans. First time he came back with two tins of chick peas. They can go in a cupboard for when I do a stew. Harry is grilling sausages and chips in the oven. Josh is back with the beans and Harry has told him,He has got his head up his arse. I am going to leave them to it and/nope; I was going to carry on with the blog but had to dish out the breakfast, eat my share and then wash up my plate and the cooking pan.  Maybe as well I can get them both to join with me and the Holy Spirit in a church service here!

Todays bible reading comes from Micah 6:6-8 (NIV)

  With what shall I come before the Lord and bow down before the exalted God? Shall I come before him with burnt offerings, with calves a years old? Will the Lord be pleased with thousands of rams, with ten thousand rivers of oil? Shall I offer my firstborn for my transgression, the fruit of my body tor the sin of my soul? He has showed you, O man, what is good. And what does the Lord require of you? To act justly and to love and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God.

I love the frankness of this last instruction. If unsure as how to live life for God, here is how; act justly, love mercy, walk humbly with God. It is up there with `love your neighbour as yourself` and `do unto others as you would have done unto you.`. These take a few moments to read, but a lifetime to perfect. Micah addresses Israel at a time when they are for from just, merciful or humble. In fact, they are a people whose `rich men are violent; her people are liars and their tongues speak deceitfully`(v. 12). He warns them of the justice to come and it is not news that he relishes giving.

(vv. 13-16)

  God does not compromise. If we are to act justly, we need to be aware of the injustice that we accept in our daily lives right now. How do we perceive the state of extreme poverty that most of the world is living in? Is it simply a consequence of poor governance, overpopulation, and unlucky ticket in the climate lottery? Are our own comforts merely the rewards of good judgement and shrewd dealing or could it actually be a case of searing injustice on a global scale?

 Whatever our view, Micah does not allow us room to consider meting out justice born of cold calculation-of the `you get what`s coming to you` variety. No. God requires us to obey him humbly by standing up against the injustices of poverty and deprivation in this world. We do this with a mercy that silences debate and steps straight out in love.

                                                                Prayer

           Lord, help us to act justly, love mercy and walk humbly with you.

                                                                                                             Isobel Peaty

I gotta go now as the winkies are holding an uprising. TTFN your brother in Christ and of Budda and all the saints. Peter. 

 

the `I AM` is really God and God in us and us in God, together.

Today we will take another step together and become more unified in the power of love, which is slow to anger and quick to forgive.

Meditation for the Day
We will learn to overcome ourself, because every blow to selfishness is used to shape the real, eternal, umperishable us. As we overcome ourself, we gain that power which God releases in our soul. And we too will be victorious. It is not the difficulties of life that we have to conquer, so much as our own selfishness.
Remember that this day is unlike any other we have experienced and so lets greet it with a smile and great expectations. Bless you. Your brother Peter G Kimble

Fish on Friday; The chainsaw and the cross

Good day my brothers and sisters. I have misplaced my wooden cross, but does it matter if I don't wear it. Not really, as its our behaviour which denotes to others  how spiritual or enlightened we are not our dress code.  (Though of course the unenlightened will tend to judge by appearances and may not notice and angel in their presence!) That is more mans need for control over others. I was going to use my chainsaw to saw up some wood for my sister Viv, but couldnt start it. The cord one pulls to turn the engine over has just about broken and so I have given up on it for the time being!

I rang my bank earlier and talked to a Hindu lady by the name of Archana. That's a lovely name, though I do not know the meaning. My guess would be, blessed by angels, but thats the artist in me.  Okay I am not saying i don't want to receive the hundreds of prayer requests which I go though from my email address at `theartistpgk@talktalk.net` but that part of me that hasn't completely transcended this physical world would like to entertain the possibility of a third serious relationship in this present life. Having said that, I must put my faith in the power of that which is greater that the wisest human, to judge what is the best conclusion to this temporary existence. (hmm, just wonder if there is a relationship between the words temporary and temporal?

                                     Meditation for the Day
I will have faith, no matter what may befall me. I will be patient, even in the midst of troubles. I will not fear the strain of life, because I believe that God knows just what I can bear. I will look to the future with confidence. I know that God will not ask me to bear anything that could overcome or destroy me.

Prayer for the Day
I pray that I may put this day and night in the hands of God. I pray for faith, so that nothing will upset me or weaken my determination to stay sober and on watch.

May the love of God which passeth all understanding be with you now and always. Your Bro Peter.

Buster, me and His girlfriend Thai, over the park a little while ago.

Good day and what a wonderful day it is for me.

I have taken my mother to the church this morning and we attended the Eucharist. I just dipped the wafer in the wine. Not that I would hit the bottle if I had a sip of wine. Its just that I want to be disciplined.

I have got to go to the dentist at around 3.30pm, to get there for a 4pm appointment. I baked bread last night and that meant I was up till 11pm, which is really late for me. As we move towards spring I start getting up earlier and going to bed earlier. In a week or two I shall be in bed by 9pm and then up at five. As we get to summer I am up at 4pm. Or a bit before if the sunrise is early. I do like to be up to see the sunrise and in bed when its dark. Of course in the summer I am in bed whilst it is still light at night.

If I am blessed in a few years time with good finances, I should like to spend the time that its dark winter here, in a part of the world where it is light and warm. Thats my request, should me and the power of Love bring that about, I shall have to wait and see. I am always open to better stuff happening which I wouldnt have envisaged. Like Buster, who I hadnt known was going to come and live with me.

Oh yes, the vicar and other women at church said they liked my hair. Di, who was over the park with Thai (Di spent some years in Thailand and so named her dog, Thai!) Hmm, If Id known that when I got Buster he could have been called Phil!

My brother Richard sorted out the tension  on my petrol chainsaw earlier and so now that is working fine. Later today, or even tomorrow, I shall saw up some logs for our sister Viv to have for her open fire.

Okay, today I shall leave you now, my brothers and sisters, with my love and peace and request we feel it and pass it on. Bless you. Peter      

Ash wednesday. Been to church(no photo) back over the park with Buster (photos)

A good day to you. Buster is just about to run into a heart in the photo above and I bet if you were to spend some time then he would also run into yours, as would I. Not because I am special, but because I am dead to this world and Christ lives in me.  God is so special, He can transform wretches like me into saints who love you. Yet not only love you, but love our enemies. I wish people could get it and I know a lot of you do. So, really that was maybe a silly wish, only God knows.

I changed my painting at church and put the latest one on the easel.

Now my brothers and sisters 21st feb we can remember the Saints and Martyrs of Africa

  During the last hundred years many Christians in Africa have died for their

  faith. One of these was Archbisop Janani Luwum of Uganda who was

  killed in 1977 while in the hands of the security forces of Idi Amin.

The preaching of both churches, Anglican and Catholic, now became more direct. `Uganda is killing Uganda,` Janani told the men at the police barracks at Nsambya during an official visit at the end of August. `We look to you to uphold the laws of our land. Do not abuse this privilege.` Afterwards some thanked him for speaking so openly, and showing them so clearly their responsibility. But others were

afraid that his words would annoy the President , whose anger might fall on them.

  Janani continued to attend government functions. `Even the President needs friends,` he would say. `We must love the President. We must pray for him. He is a child of God.` He feared no one but God who was the centre of his life. But his wish that the Church of Uganda should have a guiding influence upon the government mislead some people, who complained that he lived a comfortable life and was on the government side. When the Archbishop met one of his critics in Decamber, he made clear the truth. In words that proved prophetic, he told him: `I do not know for how long I shall be occupying this chair. I live as though there will be no tomorrow. I face daily being picked up by the soldiers. While the opportunity is there, I preach the gospel with all my might, and my conscience is clear before God that I have not sided with the present government, which is utterly self-seeking. I have been threatened many times. Whenever I have the opportunity I have told the President the things the church disapprove of. God is my witness.`  

Prayer for the acceptance of God`s will

O Lord, I know not what to ask of thee. Thou alone knows what are my true needs. Thou lovest me more than I myself know how to love. Help me to see my real needs which are concealed from me. I dare not ask either a cross or consolation. I can only wait on thee. My heart is open to thee. Visit and help me, for thy great mercy`s sake. Strike me and heal me, cast me down and raise me up. I worship in silence the holy will and thine inscrutable ways. I offer myself as a sacrifice to thee. I put all my trust in thee. I have no other desire than to fulfil thy will. Teach me how to pray. Pray thou thyself in me. Amen.

                                                 METROPOLITAN PHILARET OF MOSCOW  

One of the things I focus on strongly in that prayer is `Pray thou thyself in me.` Like Metropolitan Philaret, I surrender my all to God. I give in to His power and so let His will be done.

Have a good day my brothers and sisters. I am off in the stormy rain to get supplies, if there is money in my bank account for such as I require. Good day to you. Peter  

    

My latest art and for the action Buster saves the goal; result burst football!

 Well my brothers and sisters, good day to you,

one and all. Just took a photo of my latest painting and the paints not dry. So how is that for you getting an exclusive. Of course you are worth it. You may not be many following my blogs but you are more appreciated by me than some website authors that get thousands of hits everyday.

 I hope if my Chinese ex pat neighbour see`s this he will like the photo of Buster, as they are friends.

I went to an aa meeting last night and the plan is to go to another one tonight. Booze is not going to delay my journey. Good grief, it should just throw in the towel and admit defeat. Its like negative things need us in this world. Well it does say in my main Holy book that misery likes company. In the nineteen eighties I had a ZZ Top album with a track called `Out demons out` or at least that's the lyrics I remember. We gotta fight for the right to be free. Okay I am going to be serious and share with you why I am in this world but dont want to be of it. Too many people live for the future. Either the weekend, or the holidays or even their retirement. Well my darling wife Tracy died before she hit thirty and so her future is over.

To be a mystic is simply to participate here and now in that real and eternal life; in the fullest, deepest sense which is possible to man. It is to share, as a free and conscious agent- not a servant, but as a son - in the joyous travail of the Universe: its mighty onward sweep through pain and glory towards its home in God. This gift of " sonship," this power of free cooperation in the world-process, is man`s greatest honour. The mystic act of union, that joyous loss of the transfigured self in God, which is the crown of man`s conscious ascent towards the Absolute, is the contribution of the individual to this, the destiny of the Cosmos.  The mystic knows that destiny.  It is laid bare to his lucid vision, as plain to him as our puzzling world of form and colour is to normal sight. So my brothers and sisters I have just come up with a conundrum, which is perplexing me a insy winsy bit. Tracy, my wife who was unbalanced when she took her life, was infact acting as God, as do people when they take others lives. So I have no doubts she is secure in His love, but I because of my growing awareness and enlightenment have much greater responsibilities and duty to Him. Thats why I have to be on my guard, never to be found drunk on my watch. Just as dulits, or whatever the low caste in Hinduisum are called, didnt ask to be born into that lowest section of Indian religeous society, Jesus didnt ask to be born in an outbuilding amongs animals. God is just so amazing that many people fool them selves and others with fine robes and titles of office, but it means squat to the supreme being. Infact God laughs inside me at times, because of our folly.

Its our fortunate destiny to transcend this physical plane. We can accept that and fly, or deny it an crash!

Peace and love to you all, from brother Peter.

Good day my brothers and sisters. Another photo from the monestary + 1 from the park behind my flat.

Hi there. Good day and blessings be upon you. There was no doubt in me that the building we were visiting which had the above piece of wood on the wall, was a spiritual one. It was a little monestery which housed two monks.

The monk in his nineties was an astute and very spiritually enlightened being, full of love. I know my son Joshua took to him.

The above photo was of an autumn tree, bereft of leaves, but strewn with white paper, which fluttered in the wind.  Now it reminds me of my physical being, which is caught up in time and fluttering about. Yet can be still. Eventually though it will one way or another find its way back to the ground. The difference of course is my spiritual being which will journey on. Hopefully any sense of self will be purified, by the end of this life`s journey. Or not. I can accept what will be, will be. Amen.

                       "When love has carried us above all things . . . we receive in     
              peace the Incomprehensible Light, enfolding us and penetrating us. 
              What is this light, if it be not a contemplation of the infinite, and an
              intuition of Eternity? We behold that which we are, and we are that
              which we behold; because our being, without losing anything of its
              own personality, is united with the Divine Truth."
                                                                                               Ruysbrorck

             "Man is the meeting-point of various stages of Reality.                 
                                                                                             Rudolph Eucken.

This is the point where I say lets go off and do what we will, which in me is to diminish my will.
                                          ttfn your bro Peter. (the Buster is getting restless, though he has been out twice already and its now twenty past noon here!)

Art from; visit to Turvey monastery, my painting yesterday and photo of found object.

PICTURE THIS IMAGE ENLIGHTENMENT

 

Good day and blessings to you. Directly above is a pollystiryne (I find it incredulous that my spell check didnt pick up on that word! I spelt it wrong on purpose.) sandel. So its a found object art peace.` Lone sandel & leaves ` I really like the shape of it. I left it where it was. If there had been two, then I would have bought them to the apartment. It is interesting for a brief moment to wonder if anyone else saw it not as just, One discarded sandel, but a white footshaped object resting on fallen leaves metamorphousing into art!   I think this photo is called `Restful`

My eldest, Joshua is still with my eldest sister Vivienne and her partner Di. Its so good that they can encourage his non military interests, like bird watching, nature and art.

I shall be picking Harry up in an hour and a half to go for the communion service at All Saints church, here in Luton. Following is the first two paragraphs from chapter two, of  her book, Entering The Castle by CarolineMyss.

                                                                                                                                        2

           APPROACHING THE CASTLE:

                       READYING THE SOUL   

                                 

             THE SOUL HAS BEEN DESCRIBED in beautiful metaphors throughout world literature. Dame Julian of Norwich, an English mystic, wrote that God opened her inner eye and showed her her soul in the middle of her heart: "as large as an infinite world and like a blessed kingdom ... a glorious city. "Like Teresa of Avila, Dame Julian saw God within the center of her soul, which for us and for God is a place of peace and rest. Rumi saw the soul as having many aspects, in one poem calling it a strange tree that sometimes grows an apple and sometimes a pumpkin, sometimes causing trouble and sometimes remedying it. He wrote that the soul can be like a honey balm that restores our health or it can be restless like a tiger; sometimes the soul can help the heart grow a greater understanding, and sometimes it overturns everything we think we understand.

  The origins of the word soul may lie in the Middle English soule,from the Old English sawol, or the Old High German seula, which all hold that the soul is our nonphysical essence. Its sacredness and connection to God are widely accepted by theologians as well as psychologists. Jung, for instance, wrote that the soul is "an entity endowed withe the consciousness of its relationship to deity."

                                  Now a prayer

Prayer for the acceptance of God`s will

O Lord, I know not what to ask of thee. Thou alone knowest what are my true needs. Thou lovest me more than I myself know how to love. Help me to see my real needs which are concealed from me. I dare not ask either a cross or consolation. I can only wait on thee. My heart is open to thee. Visit and help me, for thy great mercy`s sake. Strike me and heal me, cast me down and raise me up. I worship in silence the holy will and thine inscrutable ways. I offer myself a a sacrifice to thee. I put all my trust in thee. I have no other desire than to fulfil thy will. Teach me how to pray. Pray thou thyself in me. Amen.

                           METROPOLITAN PHILARET OF MOSCOW

                        So my brothers and sisters, the sun is coming up and I must focus on getting ready for church. This will be partly done not only with prayer, but also with reflection on some more of from chapter two of the Caroline Myss book. I do hope that you all have a good day and know that you are loved.

Bless you. Peter.          

Stephen Baldwin, I am second from you tube. plus a bit from yours truly.

And also our good Lord showed, that it is full great pleasure to him that a simple soul come to him naked, plainly and homely. For this is the natural dwelling of the soul by the touchingof the Holy Ghost, as by the understanding I have in this showing.

God of thy goodness give me thyself, for thou art enough for me; and I may ask nothing that is less, that may full worship of thee; and if I ask any thing that is less, ever me wanteth. But only in thee I have all.

And these words of the goodness of God be full lovesome to the soul, and full near touching the will of our Lord; for his goodness fulfilleth all his creatures, and all his blessed works without end. For he is the endless head, and he made us only for himself; and restored us by his precious Passion, and keepeth us in his blessed love; and all this is of his goodness.

                                                 

                                           JULIAN OF NORWICH

  

Well my brothers and sisters. I shall be going shortly to pick up my son Harry and take him to the pictures, if that is what he wants to do. His brother Joshua has gone with his auntie Viv to stay with her and his auntie Di for a few days. Its good for him to get away from his computer war games for a bit and he is a keen bird watcher when given the opportunity.

Viv said that `Big Red` is a good film if it is on at our cinima, so we shall see.

I recall how glad Joshua was yesterday at the monastery to help brother Herbert, who is 91, wash their car! Children will grow up as wonderfully intergrated beings in this universe if given the opportunities to flourish.  I am off to have a quick cup of coffee and then pick Harry, up. Ttfn Peter. 

Fish on friday 17th and my new camera is here.

 Good day my brothers and sisters. I am going to have a relaxing late afternoon and evening. Above is me working at Kate`s yesterday. My art therapist. Also directly above is a photo I took of a moris minor on the way there. I liked the idea of crouching down and taking the shot from a low point, concentrating on the iconic shape of the front and the bonnet.

I got a twenty five pound premium bond win through the post today. 

I should thank my God that getting my latest artwork on the blog is my main problem at this moment.

Good day my brothers and sisters. I have just had to take a deep breath and say, its okay I cant put the photo images of my latest work on. Learn patience. They are on my spanking brand new camera. They are in a file on my computer. But, can I put a couple on this blog. That is of course a retorical question.
Just shooting off on a tangent here. Is there such a thing as a retorical answer? Later aligator.

So, its all I can do at this moment in time to describe them briefly. The latest work in progress is called `Layers` and was started off by sticking strips of coloured tissue paper on a large sheet of white paper.
I am calling it Layers as Kate my art therapist said that its the layers which are good about this work.

Kate and I have been asked to give a talk for The Philadelphia Society - (R.D. Laing)
in Hampstead - in October 2012 - on a Saturday - we agreed to use my image entitled ` Looks like a nice day; doesn`t it.  A discussion with ex Broadmoor patient and artist P.G.Kimble & his art therapist, K.Rothwell - on his use of art therapy as a means of exploring his life with an acquired brain injury.

I attended an AA meeting yesterday and it was good. Put a couple of quid in the collection box as it went around and thought about how much that was a saving both financially and in many other ways, to spending money and time drinking!
I went on the Internet to look at the `Bigbook` which other people had talked about and I identified so much with the following which I copied into my art therapy workbook.

It relived me to find out that in alcoholics the will is amazingly weakened when it comes to combating liquor, though it often remains strong in other respects.
I had always believed in a power greater than me & mankind. I simply had to believe in a Spirit of the universe, who knew neither time nor limitation. A God personal to  me, who was love, was forgiveness and also in superhuman strength and direction. Faith has to work twenty-four hours a day in and through us or we perish.

Should you find yourself the victim of other people`s bitterness, ignorance, smallness or insecurities;
Remember, things could be worse. You could be them!!!

Got to go and get ready for today. Buster has been out already for a good run. My sister will be driving me and my sons to visit Turvey monastery, where I am booked to have a talk with one of the brothers. I am contemplating joining the third order! May all who read this be blest and know you are loved. Pass it on. Your brother in Christ and of Buddha and all the Saints, Peter. 

Prayer for the begining of the day

Good day to you my brothers and sisters. Lets start with the prayer to see in this day!

To thee, O Master that lovest all men, I hasten on rising from sleep; by thy
mercy I go forth to do thy work, and I pray to thee: help me at all times, in
everything;  deliver me from every evil thing of this world and from every
attack of the devil ;  save me and bring me to thine eternal Kingdom. For
thou art my Creator, the giver and provider of everything good; in thee is
all my hope, and to thee I ascribe glory, now and ever, and to the ages of

ages. Amen 

                                               Attributed to St Macarius of Egypt


                                             Blessing of the Kindling

              I will kindle my fire this morning
              In presence of the holy angels of heaven,
              In presence of Ariel of the loveliest form,
              In presence of Uriel of the myriad charms,
              Without malice, without jealousy, without envy,
              Without fear, without terror of any one under the sun,
              But the Holy Son of God to shield me.
                   Without malice, without jealousy, without envy,
                   Without fear, without terror of any one under the sun,
                   But the Holy Son of God to shield me.
                 
              God, kindle thou in my heart within
              A flame of love to my neighbour,
              To my foe, to my friend, to my kindred all,
              To the brave, to the knave, to the thrall,
              O Son of the loveliest Mary,
              From the lowliest thing that liveth,
              To the Name that is highest of all.
                                                                  
                                                                              CELTIC PRAYER

My modern off the cuff text prayer;
                                   U r my 1&only. LUL  3>1 sos
I am sure one of you can do a lot better than that! Something for you to think about. Ponder on. Mull over in your noggin.
                                          
                                             ************************************
         
                                                                            
In one hour and a bit, I shall be driving around to pick up my mother and we shall go to our Thursday morning communion service, at All Saints, here in Luton.

My sister is down from Sheffield and has offered to take Buster to his dog training class in Milton Keynes,  so I can go to another aa meeting tonight. I must try if I say something, not to repeat what I said on a previous occasion. Apart from, "My name is Peter and Im an alchoholic".

Also my sister has brought down my fixed camera, which is great. Also because she has fixed it up for us to go and visit Turvey monastary tomorrow, so I can have a talk with a monk there.
In the the words of Tiny Tim in a Charles Dickens novel, "May God bless us, everyone." ttfn Peter  

Happy valentines day. Still no camera. No still camera. Yet imagination enhanced!

So if there is someone special whom is aware, or wishes that I ought to be declaring my undying, unfettered and awesome love, then you have it in bucketfuls. (It would help for me to know who its going to, as once it leaves me, thats it, I cant see where it goes!)     The smart thing would be to let me know in a way I couldnt mistake for just being friendly!  

We are not who our parents see us, or want us to be.

We are not who strangers see us to be.

We are not usually who our ego`s convince ourselves we are.

We are, constantly changing, ever evolving, spiritual beings having a male/female human experience!


Should you find yourself the victim of other peoples bitterness, ignorance, smallness or insecurities;
Remember, things could be worse. You could be them!!!

So good day to you my brothers and sisters. Around two weeks back I was at Kate my art therapists and declared I was going to have to give up drinking, as it wasnt a good role model for my two sons. Also their stepdad had to drink everyday, so I thought it would benefit me to be the one who didnt.
After looking at the AA website I realized I fitted the criterea of the label alchoholic. In the AA - Ive been to two meetings in the last week - they have a book called `The Big Book` I may purchase a copy when I have the funds, but for now looking at it on the internet suffices. I copied the following out of it.
Oh and proberbly the preceding sentence to this paragraph.

It relieved me to find out that in alcololics the will is amazingly weakened when it comes to combating liquor, though it often remains strong in other respects.
  I had always believed in a power greater than me & mankind. I simply had to believe in a Spirit of the universe, who knew neither time nor limitation. A God personal to me, who was love, was forgiveness and also in superhuman strength and direction. Faith has to work twenty-four hours a day in and through us, or we perish.

Although I copied the above from what someone else wrote in The Big Book, in a way I was the person who wrote it. In the bible a quote I meditate on often is, I no longer live yet Christ lives in me.

Have you heard the saying, `There but for the grace of God go I.` I am ashamed to say, but happy to share that I once was that wretch and also the fool that rushed in where angels fear to tread. Glad to say that my feet are now planted on the right side of the tracks. Grounded. Centred. Totally given up control of my life to the higher power. Oh its a state of both excitement and calm. I suppose that what being centred is. I am still osolating in the middle, yet glad not to be shooting out to an extreme. The thing we are able to do better when realize we are all one body, is forgive each other and just as importantly ourselves. We acknowledge this is not a perfect universe, but it works fine and thats how we must accept each other and ourselves. So my brothers and sisters, this is part of you saying Om Shalom and Amen for now.

Peter the peserverour. (no idea if that is spelt right as my spell checker isnt working.)           

A blast from the past

Good day my brothers and sisters

I have been feeling a bit homesick for the Philippines, even though it was my home for only six years. (Both my sons were born there and lived their first four and five years there, or three and four, I cant remember after all this time back. something like seven or eight years back. Long enough for them to have forgotten most of the language. Umbot long.   

Perhaps its a matter of home is where the heart is, that said I ought to focus all my love in the moment where I am now!

A blast from the past

The following poem I started in Laspinas Manila in march 1999 and finished at the end nov 2002

No small change, understanding room only

Confuscious, confusion, computers.
There is so much to learn, and much to forget.
Dont stir up and keep alive sour angry thoughts,
Nor people do despise.

Im wiser tan the mouse! Remember me your brother.
Im no dog, or unwanted head louse.
Yet , its me who feeds the mouse.
Not for my pleasure
Or anyones dissdain.

Indeed for its hunger
I must feed and without question
I do give to her passion

Would I beg for time to change if
I didnt want you to like
The man I hope to be?

How do I want to live?
I cannot live a lie.
I wish my dreams to fly.

Whats past is gone
I have few recollections to give.
Just this handful of memories to pass on.

                                                        Peter G Kimble

                                      ***************************************

 

As I am entering another week of refraining from alcohol, which attending AA meetings is a big help and having a belief in a power greater than me; whom I amongst others call God and Master I shall leave you today with this.   

 

Almighty and everlasting God,

behold we approach the sacrament

of the only-begotten Son, our Lord Jesus Christ.

As sick, we come to the Physician of life:

As unclean, to the Fountain of mercy:

As blind, to the Light of eternal splendour:

As needy, to the Lord of heaven and earth:

As naked, to the King of glory.

                                                       St Thomas Aquinas

 

This is your brother Peter, or Pedro to those who know me in the Philippines, wishing you all a good day and blessings to you.

Monday 6.10 am Got a de caf coffee. Well zen now for some more on meditation.

Good day to you and blessings be upon you.

Love  Love has always been central to the Judeo-Christian religious path. It shows up in the summary of Jewish law "You shall love the Lord your your God with all your heart, soul, mind and strength; love your neighbour as yourself," in Jesus` "Love your enemies," and a new commandment I give to you, that you love one another", in St Paul`s "If I speak in tongues of men and angels, but do not have love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal", in Augustines`s "Love and do what you will," even in the Beatles still current sentiment " All you need is love". But rarely does anyone really live by what it means.

One possibility, the golden rule, or, "Do as you would be done by", says nothing about what another person might want or need, and so is clearly not about love in its usual sense.

Vanstone defines love negatively, because you can say when love is absent, as not controlling being vulnerable and not being self sufficient.

Love can be defined as "Do not be that which stops other people being their real selves, or, more catchy, "Be so others can be".

Zen means stilling the mind through meditation. The experience of finding oneself through becoming able to see truly, that is to say without mistaking things that aren`t really you with yourself.

Here the word "zen" is being used to refer to the entailment's of Love: the stilling of one`s being by accepting the needs of other people to be more important than you own, and the focusing on becoming your real self by allowing your dependence's on people & things that aren`t you to be dissolved rather than followed.

There is not meant to be any specific relationship with Zen Buddhism, except insofar as Zen Christianity is to Christianity what Zen Buddhism is to Buddhism. Everything in Zen Christianity    is to be justified as an interpretation of Christianity rather than because it may be seen in Zen Buddhism.

However it is clear that za zen, the meditation style used by zen buddhism, can be used in christianity, and is relevant here at least in spiritual progress.

heaven "Being in heaven" has to be defined as the most real state of being, and for us there can be no other meaning of "real" than being without dependence on things that aren`t us.

That that is possible must be a matter of faith. We have Jesus` example of someone believing absolutely that being human is not barrier to being in heaven. However, it is "the pearl of great price" to which everything else we might want is secondary.

Change we know we are not our real selves now because we know we sometimes do that which we really do not want to do & are sometimes dependant on things that are not really us. That's true for examples, of both high and low Self esteem - both are dependencies on what other people think of us.

Of course we are not alone in that to progress towards the ideal is necessarily mutual, complex and gradual, with some being able to drop a particular need as a trigger for others becoming able to drop one of theirs. I see people like Jesus as at the forefront of the ability to let go of their attatchments to things & other peoples` natures, in this case to the extent of physical death, which is why he and others like him have been central to real progress in human life.

Some people react to the need for inner change by trying to simplify their exterior lives to the minimum by joining monasteries etc. Nowadays there are many ways to lead one`s life that need for a particular individual for a specific set of tensions & motivations is best net by the variety of situations that ordinary life creates. Anyway, it is necessary to connect with the world in general so that the world in general changes as we change.

attonement  At-one-ment; is about being at one with God. It also refers to what Jesus achieved by dying on the cross. The view here of what Jesus acheived is based on "Greater love hath no man than that he lay down his life for his friend" Loving someone entails wishing them to become who the truly are, which means helping them to believe that letting go of their unreal dependencies will lead to them being more real, even though those dependencies currently define reality for that person. In allowing himself to be put through physical death Jesus showed us the greatest possible faith in the actual source of reality.

                         from Sikhism
One universal Creator God. The name is Truth. Creative Being Personified. Fear. No Hatred. Image Of The Undying, Beyond Birth, Self-Existant By Gurus Grace.

                       *************************************************

Peace and love cannot depend on man and in saying that I shall also declare that today - which the birds are singing in at this moment - will be a great day for us.

My love to you who read this and to all beings. Peace and love, pass it on.
Your brother Peter

It will seem that life isn`t long enough for significant change. Many people go through it changing only right at the end, or perhaps on marriage or some other significant event, and many without apparently making any progress at all, though one can never entirely tell. Faith in our potential suggests reincarnation could be believed in as a way in which God gives us enough time, not only to change sufficiently but to do so within our own free will as our desires mature towards "storing up our treasure in heaven not on earth."

It is 5.11am here in Luton on sunday. Its not saturday here.

Good day folks. My sons are fast asleep in bed. I say `fast`, but am not sure if what we don't realise we are saying when we use that word, is , not eating or drinking! What other meaning of `fast` could it mean? It cant be fast as in movement. Yet of course I know there may be one which is blindingly obvious to you and you are saying, " Peter, what a plonker you are." How could it be be blindingly obvious to you. Well I know that one. If you are playing blind mans buff in a farm yard and stumble into the manure heap, then its blindingly obvious where you are. That reminds me of a saying. "If life keeps dumping manure/shit on you, then try growing roses.
I got up this morning and cant locate my glasses. I believe that last night I took them to bed with a book to read and so they may be in the bedroom somewhere. As the boys are in there asleep I am unable to put the light on and have a good hunt.

The search for wisdom is a great challenge, to act on wisdom is an even greater challenge.

Charity may begin at home, but if it goes no further its no longer charity. Its clan loyalty.


If you cant swim, don't blame the water. P G Kimble

After borrowing and reading a book called Zen and Christianity, I looked up the subject on the Internet. Coming as I did to the place which rendered the following, at anweald  .co.uk

Interestingly enough, the person who created this site - not unlike me - started off their religious life in I believe the Church of England, but dont quote me on that. I have no idea if like me, after exploring Buddism they ended up doing the full circle back to Christianity! For enlightened ones, we are all one and so its not that important if we tell others we are non believers, muslims, jews, jains, sun worshippers, or hindus. At the centre of all is the creative force of love, which was in existance before there were people to name it.

the end    The point of life is to be made in heaven as individuals, as groups of individuals &in creation as a whole.
the start  That we are "made in the image of God", which means "being in heaven", "uniting with God", "being yourself", "being whole", "being holy" all means the same thing, and that is meant to be realized here and now.
And that Jesus is our best example of a human being in heaven, though He cant be unique in that else theres no point in following Him!
the way increasing your ability to love - in the Christian sense of not being that which stops others being their real selves - is also a path towords being your own real self - in the zen sense that being your real self is not just being dependant on things that arent really you - which in turn is a pathe towards being in Heaven in the Christian sense.

Okay my brothers and sisters. Its 6.05 am and I am going to make myself a decaff coffee and then go back to bed for some prayer and meditation. As both boys anf me were sleeping on my double matress which is on a platform nearly five feet off the floor, I will not risk the possibility of waking them and shall go to there room. Buster sleeps on the bottom bunk of their bunkbed as they no longer use it and so I shall go to the top. You all have a good day. Go in peace and know you are loved. Your brother Peter

Good day my brothers and sisters. Its fish on Friday

Hope that you are well in the holistic sense, or are at least like me and are well under way getting there. It will be wonderful when the time comes with a smile and we can say, thank God, I have arrived.

Last night I went to a big AA (Alcoholics Anonymous) meeting at Quaker House, here in Luton. My first impressions were, thank God for this organisation. As there were around a hundred or so people there, it had quite an impact on me. If we think of the number of people who accept that drinking is a problem and are trying, hopefully with success, to beat it; then how many are carrying on oblivious.

That's my problem, I should say our problem. As we are in this together; this world and period of time.

                             time keeps on changing into the future

I hear someone saying, `Its not my problem.` Well my friend, we can ignore stuff, but it doesn't make it go away. Everything is linked in one way or another. I remember about fifteen years or so ago, I went on holiday with a sister and our parents to Jersey, in the channel Islands. I got talking to a lady on the beach, who had a disabled child and his father had left them, or not.     I cant remember that bit, yet funnily enough I am able to recall that she was topless. Strange what one can remember. Well not really when you understand memory and the brain! Which reminds me of something amazing. On the computer last night I saw an ape who's memory and recall could beat almost any human. It was given after training, just a fraction of a second - something like 1/6 of a second to remember, like eight numbers and it done wonderful. The numbers flashed on the screen so quick I couldn't take them in at all. Okay, I want to get back to the topless woman on the beach. This was probably within a year or so of my wife dying and me getting the brain injury. Anyway, she told me her name , I`d forget it and mention that this was because of my head-injury and could she tell me again. After a few times, she said, "Peter, where are we?" I replied that we were on the beach. "What are we sitting on, on the beach?" So now some fifteen years or so later, yep I can recall her name, Sandy Beach. NO, only joking. It was, or still is, Sandy. Oh yes on talking I found out that not only, like me, did she come from England. She came from Leighton Buzzard and knew who my cousin Andy Kimble was. Small world, we agreed.
Okay, now for anybody who is waiting for the Fish on Friday bit, its coming up after I make myself a coffee. Not perhaps a lovely cup of coffee, but at least a reasonable one! Decaf did someone inquire? Yes. I limit the caffiene to when I feel I need its effect/ability to stop me falling asleep. For instance before going to church. Joke lang. (do you notice the filipino word creeping in there and showing that a bit of my heart is pinoy!)               

Its just coming up to 6.30am and a bird is singing in the day. Okay, that was a nice distraction.


                                 FISH ON FRIDAY

I believe it was my sister  vivienne who for a birthday or Christmas present, gave me the book Thomas a Kempis, The Inner Life. How good it is on helping me further my spiritual journey.




    Took a break there to go over the park with Buster and the sled.
    Am obviously back. So back to Thomas a Kempis.       


                                                   CHAPTER 42

                        A Warning against Vain and Worldly Learning

CHRIST.  My son, do not allow fair phrases and subtle sayings to beguile you;
for the Kingdom of God comes not by words, but by My power. Pay attention to My words, for
they fire the heart and lighten the understanding, foster contrition and bring all comfort.  Never study in order to appear more wise and learned; study rather to overcome your besetting sins, for this will profit you more than will the grasp of intricate problems.
  When you have read and mastered many subjects, always return to this fundamental truth: that I am He who teaches man knowledge, and who grants My children a clearer understanding than man can impart. He whom I teach will swiftly gain wisdom and advance far in the life of the spirit. But those who seek curious knowledge from men, and care nothing for My service, will discover only sorrow. In due time Christ will come, the Teacher of teachers and Lord of Angels. He will hear the lessons of all; that is, He will examine each man`s conscience. He will search jerusalem with lamps; the hidden things of darkness will be brought to light, and the tongues of controversy silenced.
  I am God, who enable the humble-minded to understand more of the ways of the everlasting Truth in a single moment than ten years of study in the Scools. I teach in silence, without the clamour of controversy, without ambition for honours, without confusion of arguement. I teach men to despise earthly things, to find this present life burdensome, to seek eternal things, to shun honours, to endure injuries, to place all trust in Me, to desire nothing but Myself, and to love Me ardently above all things.
  There was once a man who loved Me very dearly, who learned My divine secrets, and spoke eloquently of Me. He profited more by renouncing everything than by studying subtleties. For some I speak on everyday affairs; to others on particlar matters; to some I graciously reveal Myself in signs and symbols, while to those who are enlightened I reveal My mysteries.
   A  book has but a single voice, but is not equally profitable to all who read it. I alone am the Teacher of truth, the Searcher of man`s heart, the Discerner of his doings, and I give to each man as I judge right.
                                           ************************************
Well my brothers and sisters, thats it for now. I bid you a good day and a good weekend. Go in peace to serve others with  loving hearts and restful minds. Your brother in Christ Jesus, Watchman Kimble

   

G L U E Lets stick together

God, its cold and not just outside. If I wasn't typing then my hands would be gloved, or in my pockets. 

Loves not at all bothered by temperature, it just goes to where there is space for love!

Us. That is you, me and God of our understanding, are in this together. TOGETHER (operative word)

Everlasting time to start, is now. Now is the only moment we can surrender to change. Let go. Go.

                    *******************************************************
So the above isn't brilliant, but its my first attempt to put a word spelt with the word from capitals going downwards. maybe something better will come later when more brain cells have thawed from this big freeze. How I can miss being in the Philippines on a cold day like this!

Bye for now though and Oh yes, know that you are loved.
Your brother Peter.

ps. There is no need to go to India or anywhere else to find peace. You find that deep place of silence right in your room, your garden or even your bathtub.  Elizabeth Kubler Ross    (so guess where Im going now with a hot cup of decaf coffee!)

I think therefore I am. So thoughts can control feelings. Think LOVE FEEL LOVING.

Good day, as this is another cold day perhaps we who are in a cold climate can think, or have the belief that we are warm and we will be warm. Stupid! No. Ascetics with practise,  like some monks in Tibet jump in an ice cold lake and then soaked in icy water, sit and meditate whilst their robes dry. They have control over the body to that extent. In India, holy men can stick needles through themselves without drawing blood.

Who are we and can we get stuck in a rut. Are some of us defined by what others say about us?

If we are not happy with ourselves, then we may see the unhappiness reflected around us. Our thoughts become our actions, which in turn can become habits. these habits are each moment they pass, become our past. So people and this often includes ourselves become stuck on the image they hold of each other. Because each moment in time brings changes to this world and our mind cannot adapt to all of these changes, we hold the past in our mind until circumstances force revaluation. When we free ourselves of the past, then we no longer depend on it to know who and where we are.

Part of me is now trying to stop defining each present moment in relationship with the past or any hopes for the future. I have to judge when crossing a busy road when to step across, but dont need to judge if anyone inside the car is good, bad, short or tall; its not relevant to my wanting to be on the other side of the road. When I judge, it is not an I seperate from the car, the earth, or the sun and moon. It is the I which is part of the great I Am.

   

O dear, back to now. The alarm has gone of and so I must shortly make my way the the clinic to have a blood test. Once we get to fifty yrs old they like to test our blood to look for risk of heart attack. I must go along with them, even though I am as fit as a fiddle. I will be back.

Your brother Peter.